If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
