I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
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