They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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