You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Randomize