i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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