Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
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