We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Randomize
