Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
