so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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