Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
