just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
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