how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
