dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
The air was thick with penises
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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