I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
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