Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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