I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
