just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
