check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
