READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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