I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
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