I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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