They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
