ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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