maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
