Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.

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  (803): I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen. (803): He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather. http://tfl.nu/rlak
  Replies (12) Good night (1532) Bad night (784)
• Favorite

  (502): View more from Kentucky

  I think I sharted a yagerbomb.

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  (502): I think I sharted a yagerbomb. http://tfl.nu/xi3d
  Replies (15) Good night (669) Bad night (3573)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening

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  (732): and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening http://tfl.nu/8ijj
  Replies (17) Good night (1387) Bad night (4696)
• Favorite

  (469): View more from Texas

  is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?

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  (469): is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl? http://tfl.nu/85q0
  Replies (23) Good night (3931) Bad night (766)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride

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  (540): she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride http://tfl.nu/utbu
  Replies (47) Good night (1046) Bad night (7565)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship

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  (775): Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship http://tfl.nu/iroi
  Replies (19) Good night (4431) Bad night (987)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.

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  (419): We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun. http://tfl.nu/fiqf
  Replies (10) Good night (4351) Bad night (925)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward

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  (518): I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward http://tfl.nu/3430
  Replies (11) Good night (3923) Bad night (916)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment

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  (847): i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment http://tfl.nu/9by6
  Replies (3) Good night (2359) Bad night (1083)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.

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  (513): I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star. http://tfl.nu/6ohf
  Replies (19) Good night (5393) Bad night (1007)
• Favorite

  (229): View more from Georgia

  My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.

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  (229): My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits. http://tfl.nu/0r0j
  Replies (6) Good night (1501) Bad night (949)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.

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  (330): We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner. http://tfl.nu/1e2r
  Replies (2) Good night (1784) Bad night (614)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.

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  (678): Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me. http://tfl.nu/6dhe
  Replies (9) Good night (1624) Bad night (546)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.

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  (919): I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water. http://tfl.nu/3pkl
  Replies (1) Good night (718) Bad night (296)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me

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  (360): it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me http://tfl.nu/wv06
  Replies (1) Good night (234) Bad night (377)

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