It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize
