We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize
