so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Randomize
