im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
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Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
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I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
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