Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
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