never play flip cup with pint glasses
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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