my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Drake has all the answers
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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