just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize