so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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