I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
