I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
True strength comes from lack of pants
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
