Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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