You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
