so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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