we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
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Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Alive.
So much puke
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
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Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize