Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
