just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
My dick has a subreddit
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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