what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
