similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
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no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
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It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
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