Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
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