i may or may not be watching the land before time
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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