Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
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It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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