Sober January is a disaster.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
