I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.