somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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