4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
