While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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